what is home anyway

i am sitting here in the front desk of a hostel in india. there is sweat dripping down my popliteal and bugs sticking to it. rawr.


last semester, we had a guest lecturer in one of our classes (these happen a lot when some professors get lazy), and the first question he asked us is: what do you call home? i believe i've blogged about this idea before, but i'm going to expound my thoughts again as i've had this swirling around my head and it's about hurricane size, ready to explode.


the question really bothered me. and then it bothered me that the question bothered me. why would i tell a stranger what i considered home? and why did it matter? what if i don't really have a place i call home?


at the time he asked me, i had living in arizona about a month and was already struggling with this during introductions. here's how a normal converastion would go at the beginning:

attractive stranger boy: oh you just moved here? what's your name?
me: brook.
where are you from? california.
what part? bay area.
oh cool! do you know, so and so? nope, i haven't lived there since HS.
oh, so where did you live before? draper, ut.
....ASB introduces me to his friend: this is brook from ut!

NO!!


so then my answer started being, from CA, but lived in UT seven years. then that was too much and people would start glazing over, because let's face it--no one really cares. so then i would say UT, but i hated claiming it, no matter how much i loved my time there. ultimately, it bothered me because if they only took the time to really find out, they'd know i was born in hawaii, lived in japan, am half chilean (and therefore half of my heart remains there), lived in LA, northern california, extended stays in central/south america, provo (uff!), draper, and scottsdale. and now here i sit calling hyderabad, india, my home for the next few months of my life.


so i know you're all dying to know what i told the guest lecturer: i told him, home is where my family and friends are. the more i think about it, the more i wonder, what is it with us humans and wanting to define somewhere we "belong?" it is more than home that we are seeking, i've concluded. when we are answering this question, we are identifying in one way or another. i would not claim UT, because i refuesed to identify with the stereotypes. we are choosing to categorize ourselves by where we say we were raised, brought up, etc.and it envokes in us a sense of pride, embarrassment, work ethic, and stamps unto us a whole set of values, core beliefs, accent, dialect, skin color, sometimes religion, and way of thinking. home is more than just a physical, tangible border. home is an essense, a person, a being.


anyway, i'm glad i have that off my chest now. i will continue to give the answer that home is where my friends and family are, because i have become such a cocktail of all the parts and pieces of where i've lived it would be impossible to name one place as home anyway. i love each and every place i've lived for the things it's taught me and for the pieces i've taken from it, and more importantly for the relationships i've formed there.


anyway, i'm excited to see where i will be calling home here in the next 36 hours. daunting, and thrilling all at the same time. 


love and miss you all.

WOW is MOM upside down

"Women of God can never be like women of the world. The world has enough women who are tough; we need women who are tender. There are enough women who are coarse; we need women who are kind. There are enough women who are rude; we need women who are refined. We have enough women of fame and fortune; we need more women of faith. We have enough greed; we need more goodness. We have enough vanity; we need more virtue. We have enough popularity; we need more purity." --Margaret D. Nadauld 

at my graduation

trouble....

what, you don't model your shoulder pads??

As my mom read me this quote the other night, I couldn't help but think that it exemplified and personified my mother to the "t." She has always had her priorities in the right place, and has done a good job of teaching me the things that are most important: faith, virtue, and refinement. Yes, I have a long way to go before I reach the point to where my mamasita has, but I love her for her example she is to me.


Happy Birthday, mamita!
xoxo

my turf

since my definition would sound too white for this type of dance....here's the definition according to urban dictionary:

"Controlled movements like popping (struttin) but with a more fluid movements and not as precise as poppin. Turfin started in Oakland, Ca. Oakland has a long history of poppin (such as the Oakland Street Poppers etc) and have been doin it for a long time. When you see "Turfin" one can't help but see the popping influences (mixed with a little bayness like poppin collars and the general swagger baydestrians tend to have) and the general bay surroundings. Since the west coast basically perfected popping, it was only natural for similar derivatives to come out. It is a natural evolution from it's b-boying roots to it's mainstream popularity today. Elementary to high school students to twenty-somethings are turfin and it's has since become the dance of the bay area. Lots of folks have been doing this type of dancing, but just recently it's been given a title."


and here is the illest video i've found of turfing so far. the dancing starts around 1:15. get ready to have your mind blown away.





xoxo
your utah baydestrian

When you wake up...WAKE UP!

WARNING: this is journal-entry-like, and may or may not contain some bragging.

now that you've been sufficiently warned, i will continue.

the last two (and a half) ish weeks have been a complete explosion of magnificence and my face may just fall off from smiling way way way too much. sadly enough, i can't post a some of the awesomeness on this public forum, as i'm not sure i want everyone to know yet, but i'll share a minor snippet of the moments:

1. i saw imogen heap in concert. let me tell you, she's just as (if not more) brilliant in person. i will dedicate a whole future post to my love for her, so no worries about that.

2. RSL won the Eastern Conference Finals (in over-over-over-over time). No I am not a fair weather fan. I've, as a matter of fact, been a fan since May. I also may or may not be a jumbo tron (big screen) regular, making an appearance in the last 7 or 8 games. No big deal.

3. I went home and went through the temple. Absolutely gorgeous experience. Fun to be home with my parents, fun to eat fresh seafood on San Francisco, fun to have 70 degree weather in November (but not fun to go back to Utah and 30 degree weather), and fun to have a good excuse to take pictures.

4. Real Salt Lake won the MLS CUPPPPP!!!!!! (in over-over-over-over time...AGAIN). I have included pictures below to prove my undying and unconditional love for the team (and more specifically, Kyle Beckerman--not to be confused with the over-paid diva, David Beckham). My only beef is now that Utah has a somewhat successful professional team, everyone has jumped onto the band wagon, and those that have been fans for the whole season (through thick and thin) have to suffer for over-crowded lines for signatures, and over-priced tickets. I, however, never lost faith.

5. BYU WON!!!!!! (in over time) Go cougs!

6. I got an ulcer from all of the over-time winning games.

7. I found out that I passed my CHES exam, and will now be signing all important things

(including this blog) as "Brook, CHES." Okay, that's ridiculous, but I'm really excited about

having passed with flying colors (even IF I didn't beat my boss' score and my other boss has no idea what a CHES is).

Now, if you know where the title of this blog post comes from, i will give you a big treat (no seriously, i will!). that song has become my anthem, because although the last few weeks have been INCREDIBLE, they haven't been without hardship or trial (but who wants to revel in those??). These instances have in fact been my "tender mercies" and what has kept me smiling and going (besides you all, of course).

Well, i guess that's all for now.

xoxo,

Brook, CHES (just kidding. kind of.)

Vivianita

Mamita,

You are absolutely incredible. Thanks for being an example of virtue, integrity, honesty, beauty, love, for encouraging me in my ridiculous persuits, for taking me seriously when sometimes no one else does, for teaching me how to attempt to be crafty (you're way better than i am!!), for always teaching me to study, to read, to love to learn, to love the gospel, and to love others. Today, I am celebrating your life, as you have almost been taken from me one too many times. Love you tons. Happy bday.

xoxo

Brookie Baby, Pumpkin, Sweetie (all names my mother affectionately calls me)

ps. picture line up: my mom sends me love notes via pictues, the second one is not my mother, but me with an amazing quilt she made me for my 21st!!, and the last clip is about the women in our lives. i loveeeee it.

home

i'm loving the little "project" that is asking people to submit

what home is to them....

i posted the post card that i think describes me perfectly.

home.........................(for me (now i'm sounding like randy jackson))

-changes every year

-is not defined by any possessions, as each one is completely temporary

-will always remind me of these beauties:

Princess Scratch

jaja...(that is like "haha" in español, which means spanish in spanish)

anyhoo, my dad is awesome. the following were three stati on the book in one day:

"is laughing because a friend accidentally sent him a love note via text message intended for someone else..." (the best part, is he received this aforementioned message during early-morning seminary while my mom was teaching and started to uncontrollably giggle...the text message from a MAN friend called the recipient of the text princess. oh dear....) 

"is hoping Dan Hesse (the CEO of Sprint) has forgiven him for scratching the screen on his Pre last week." (at least the Sprint team lovingly dubbed him "Scratch" after that)

"is laughing because last week he went to Ted's Grill in Kansas and when it was time to pay he took the one that said "Ted's Copy" thinking it was clever of them to put my name on there. When I got the credit card bill they charged me an extra dollar. I'm not laughing anymore." 

i am now going to start calling my dad princess scratch. 

and well, since i'm talking about him, i'm going to put some pretty awesome pics up of the only man in my life. he is pretty awesome.

the WINDY CITY

i believe that America is completely mistaken when they named Chicago the windy city. clearly, those who dubbed the i'm-sure-somewhat-windy-city, well, "the windy city" had NEVER been to draper, utah.

anyone who knows me knows that i have never been one to really "watch my step" and have ran into many poles, tripped over many side walks, and crossed the street only to be honked at by an angry swerving car. this tendency to be horrifically ditsy when i walk is only worsened in severe weather. as of late, the weather here in utah has reached freezing temperatures only to have the street of nechatel dr covered by a foot of snow {when others only receive inches} and plenty of ice. this in combination with 30 mph winds make for a hilarious sight to others, and a very stressful walk to my car at the bottom of the hill for me.

not only have i been having walking trouble, but my poor california-loving vehicle has had trouble until recently when my parents so kindly donated some $$ towards my snow tire cause.

anyway, this morning, my mom asked me if i made it to the bottom of the hill okay. in response, i told her, "yes i made it fine....on my butt the whole way."

this. was. no. exaggeration.

someday, i'll be able to face my neighbors again. as for now, i'll icy-hot my bum.

Merry Christmas!!

well, our family did an electronic christmas card again so go and check it out!

i hope you all have a lovely christmas and that you feel the <3.....(i know i'm a total dork for the picture above...i just love field hockey)

the ghost of thanksgiving past....

i just have to say that i've been sooo fortunate to have been able to have SUCH wonderful friends that have become family to me.

this is evident whenever i get sick, as people are SO willing to help me, comfort me, hug me, text me, call me, bring me movies, ask me how i'm doing, or even facebook me. 

i am honestly blessed beyond words to be able to have people in my life, and i can honestly say i've never been alone.

well, in addition to all of those instances mentioned above, i've had 4 out of the last 5 thanksgivings where i haven't been able to go home, and i just have to commemorate each one individually:

1. thanksgiving with the parrishes in park city, utah--one of my good friends marissa invited not only me, but another bestie to join her family in one of the best memories from my freshman year. we did everything from text our freshman boy crushes, to sleep, and experience my first thanksgiving in the snow:

2. thanksgiving with the hutchisons in some southern utah town near st. george--whitney and her family invited me in to their beautiful cabin for a crazy adventure in 4-wheeling, christmas-tree-decorating, antique shopping, watching at least a dozen movies, and not to mention a tv marathon for i think 14 hours (although i can't remember what show it was.....i'm pretty sure it was the amazing race):

3. this was the year i actually got to go home. we hiked around 'frisco, went to the beach, decorated for christmas, and mostly just had fun being together. it was so wonderful!!

4. thanksgiving with the cotterells--this was an unforgettable family-packed thanksgiving. i honestly have never been to a function that big other than a ward function, but i ate up every second of: apples to apples, adorable nieces/nephews/cousins, chocolate, enchanted, and the most memorable spiritual thanksgivings so far. unfortunately, i didn't take any pics so sorry (i was embarrassed cuz i went tanning right before thanksgiving to boost my Vit D levels. needless to say i was a lobster...).

5. thanksgiving with the robinsons--i have never seen a more elaborate center piece and place settings in my life! we even each had our own see's candy. we also: played clue (i kind of won), taboo (our team won), and guesstures which i prefer not to talk about. it was so great! Thanks Allie!

dear christmas,

dear christmas,

i have suddenly become VERY excited for your arrival.

i did not get enough of josh groban's cd last year, especially the song featuring faith hill.

i never got a chance to see the nutcracker last year, which i hope to do this year.

i hope to see a christmas carol this year as well.

all in all, i can't wait until temple square is so lit up it almost catches fire and everyone is buzzing with supreme excitement and complete romantical-ness.

i can't wait until people wont get annoyed with me for blasting christmas music (i have several recommendations if you need some fabulous tunes).

i can't wait until i can give people their presents i've been planning out for months.

i can't wait until i get to go home....(unlike the sooner holiday, thanksgiving. yes, i AM wallowing in self pity because i don't get to see family or even have roomies that will be around. turkey sub from quiznos, anyone?)

...waiting for the weather outside to become frightful,

nice (as opposed to naughty) brook

dear chile,

dear land of my forefathers (sounds biblical, doesn't it?),

feliz cumpleaños!! today marks your glorious independence, and what better way to celebrate than to make delicious desserts and a blog post?

here's a little snippet of chile:

the national flower:

the national bird (a condor, one of the largest birds in the world):

the national dance, the cueca:

and last, but not least the national anthem (beware, it's VERY majestic and is about 7 hours long. okay, they usually only sing the first verse and chorus, but with all trillion verses-maybe 7 total?-it's super long):

oh and here are some desserts i made to celebrate the occasion! 

they're called alfajores, and i think you should all try making this simple and delectable dessert. here's the recipe!

for the cookie part:

1 C (plus a little) of flour

1/2 C corn starch

1/4 tsp of baking powder

1/8 tsp of salt

1/4 C sugar

1 stick of butter

1 egg

1/2 tsp vanilla extract

for the insides:

buy dulce de leche already made....

or you can cook your own by cooking condensed milk in a double broiler in the top part until it's the color/consistency you want

preheat oven to 35o degrees

1. beat butter and sugar until fluffy

2. in another bowl mix everything dry (1C flour, cornstarch, baking powder, and salt)

3. add egg and vanilla to butter and sugar mix

4. add all dry stuff and mix until it starts sticking all together. if it's too moist, add a little more flour until it's a good consistency. not too moist, not too dry, cuz it has to stick together

5. grab bits of dough to roll up into your hand (should be like the size of a bouncy ball) and then smash them so they're about 1/8 of an inch thick. you could also roll it out, and then cut it into any shape you want. whichever you prefer.

6. cook until sides are a little golden brown (somewhere between 12 and 20 minutes)

7. allow them to cook off

8. put about a teaspoon or more between two cookies, and then roll the edges in powdered sugar!

from: http://nookandpantry.blogspot.com/2007/12/alfajores.html

so...

so i forgot to post some pictures from my trip to california last weekend...

so sometimes i really miss the ocean and this is why:

so i probably LOVED my trip to california with great company, and some key bonding experiences.

so maybe i wish i were untainted from the world like this man:

so maybe i wish i could just sit at the beach and strum on my guitar completely oblivious to what others think of me....

so maybe i'm so excited to graduate and travel the world...but maybe i'm terrified of responsibility and uncertainty

so maybe nobody would go to the brad pitt movie audition with me on sat, so i went on a gorgeous hike instead with my bootsie:
so maybe i'll miss the beauty that is utah when i leave here

so maybe i'll come back after my sabbatical...

so maybe i love spooning in the back of cars:

so maybe i have an unhealthy obsession with acoustic music...

so sometimes i really miss people that i used to hang out with. maybe this happens quite often since i've had so many random groups of friends over the course of my lifetime.

so maybe i've recently decided to have "more purpose in prayer"... which has lead to a desire to have more purpose in conversation, and in living in general

so sometimes i wish i could have deep meaningful conversations with everyone i meet...i wish i could figure out people's motivations in life.

so maybe i often become overwhelmed by the way people treat each other, and i wish i could fix everything.

so maybe i just wanted to say that i love you!

so maybe that was super cheesy.....

so maybe i love "that's what she said" jokes....and i feel like a terrible person every time i say one

so maybe i will someday stop trying to fit way too many things in one day, and maybe i will stop over-analyzing every situation...

so possibly someday i'll be able to see my parents every time i miss them

so maybe i'm a sucker for poetry...

so maybe this post is random...

but honestly, do you expect any less from me?